Frequently Asked Questions.

How does mediation work? - Family Mediators help identify and clarify the matters you may wish to consider and will help you identify and collect the documents and information for the mediation. The Mediator will discuss the choices open to you and help you to negotiate with each other to reach decisions that are acceptable to you both. Very importantly a Mediator will help you to keep the needs of any children at the forefront of any negotiations and can also discuss how you can talk to your children appropriately about the arrangements you reach.

What does the Mediator do? - The Mediator's job is to act as an impartial third party and manage the process of the mediation, helping you to exchange information, ideas and feelings constructively. The Mediator has no power to impose a decision or settlement on you, the responsibility for all decisions remains with yourselves since you know better than anyone else what is right for your family. The Mediator will not advise you about the best option either for your children or right for your family. The Mediator will not advise you about the best option either for your children or your financial affairs, nor can the Mediator protect your individual interest. However the Mediator can give you legal information where it is needed to ensure you reach informed decisions.

What about solicitors? - Suffolk Mediation is independent and has no association with any Solicitors firm. We will encourage you to contact your solicitor during the mediation process if it is felt you need legal advice. If the mediation results in agreed written summaries recording your decisions, then you will be advised to take the Open Financial Summary to your solicitor for discussion and advice. Your solicitors will also be able to translate information from this into a legally binding form if this is what you wish to do.

The things which can be agreed in mediation include: -

* Where the children will live when parents separate.

* How the children will share their time between their parents.

* How much children will see of members of their extended family.

* How parents will communicate with one another in the future about their children.

* How property, pensions and other financial assets are to be divided up.

* Payments to be made by either party for the support of family members.

* Whether any agreements are to be formalised in a Separation Deed or in divorce proceedings.

Is it confidential? - Yes, mediation sessions are all confidential and legally privileged. This means that, even if you do end up in court later on, the judge is not entitled to ask about the conversations that took place in mediation sessions. however, the are 2 exceptions to that confidentiality. -

* If the Mediator feels that either of you, or any children involved, are at risk of serious harm then the Mediator will have to report the matter to social services and/or the police and mediation will have to stop.

* If the Mediator finds any financial irregularities, (for example people receiving income upon which they are not paying tax when they should be, or people receiving benefits they are not entitled to) then mediation will stop.

What if the court has already been involved? - You can come to a mediation assessment meeting at any point in a legal dispute, provided that the circumstances of your case are suitable for the mediation process. Indeed, many courts actively encourage people to try and resolve the issues between them outside the court process when ever possible.

What if there has been domestic violence or abuse in our relationship? - If there has been domestic violence or abuse in your relationship it is important that you tell the Mediator about this in your initial assessment meeting. If the violence or abuse has been very serious the Mediator may decide that your case is not suitable for mediation. However, there may be cases in which the level of violence or abuse may not rule out mediation. That is a matter for the Mediator to consider carefully in each case before deciding whether or not to proceed with mediation.

What about the cost? - Private mediation services vary in their charging rates.We charge £100 per hour for all work done with or for a couple having mediation.A Family Solicitor charges at least £150 per hour per client.The difference being that in Mediation you are only paying one set of fees rather than two ie if you each consulted a Solicitor you would be costing your family at least £300 per hour.In Mediation together you would be saving £200 per hour.

Another cost advantage of using family mediation is that the mediator will help you to identify the documents and information you will need; so that you can collect and to bring these to the mediation yourself rather than paying your solicitor to collect this information for each of you.

Fees are normally payable on a session by session basis with each of you deciding how these are divided between you.

A final word -

Even if, for one reason or another, mediation does not in your particular case result in an agreement, there will almost always be benefits from having attended mediation. For example, you will both have had a chance to tell your stories and to express any anger or disappointment in a safe place. You will have had time to consider the effect of your future arrangements on your children, and also to consider the position of other close relatives. Outstanding issues will have at least been clarified and narrowed down, even if there is no final agreement. As to the costs of litigating where mediation is not successful, you may well return to your solicitor with either partial or complete financial disclosure which has been exchanged with your partner on an open basis. This should save your own solicitor a good deal of work which means savings in time and costs.